blast from the past

i got an email saying that jon has a new baby.

NO, i didn't go around asking stuff about him.
NO, i don't care what goes on with his life.

YES, i know i'm not fooling anyone with that last statement.

i DO care.

memories long forgotten came flashin back.
all the pain, all the drama which i tried to erase suddenly resurfaced.

i DO care.

NOT the i still love him kinda care. not even the i wish he's miserable kind.

i just know i still DO.

and until i stop doin that, i know i'm in deep shit!