Scammed?

a couple of my friends and i were havin drinks at cable car last night. they won a basketball game and wanted to have a short night cap.

we went out for a few mins to smoke (since we can't inside) when a fairly decent guy approached us and started blabbering about how his atm got stuck and he can't get cash. that he knows it's embarrassing to ask strangers for gas money but he just needed to go pick his wife up who apparently was in a taping for Sis .

so, after all the blah, i told him how much we can spare. that if it's just gas money he needed, it was ok. gave him a couple of hundreds and said we know shit happens. he wanted to get our number so he could pay us back but we said it was no biggie. after all, it was just gas money.

off he left in his pretty nice car. we went inside. if he was lying, then so be it. karma's a bitch. either way, it was an act of goodwill on our part.

then came one of the waiters. asked us if we knew who that guy was. told him we didn't. apparently, he is the hubby of an actress, a very popular actress. and that he is often seen around the area selling stuff just for a couple of hundred bucks.

oh well, like i said, either way, it was an act of goodwill on our part.

....

four sheep....five sheep....

sleep deprived

that's how i've been for the longest time! it's a good thing i'm one of those who never develops eyebags but that's the only upside to it.

no matter how early i go to bed, i ALWAYS end up tossing and turning til i finally doze off, which, is usually around 4 or 5 in the morning.

now, if i had a night job, that would be such a wonderful thing but no! i have a regular 9 to 5 job which means i have to be up before 7 or risk being late! what does that leave me? a good 3hrs of sleep at most! and i'm talkin 5-6 days a week!i'm actually surprised that i (bite my tongue) haven't had a meltdown.

according to the National Sleep Foundation people my age should sleep at least 7 hrs.

7 hours? i didn't even make it halfway! i'm contemplating on taking melatonin since i read it helps but i am too freakin scared of possible side effects.

i'm not depressed. i'm not overworked. i go to the gym. i don't take caffeine after 6. i'm a chronic insomniac! deng it!

one sheep...two sheep...three sheep....

weekend on the beach

An almost perfect weekend at La Luz Resort in Laiya, Batangas.
Considering the events of the week before, i say, we all had fun.

the sand

the cabana

the beach

the sunset

my greatest fear in life

last week, my bestfriend's lola died.
today, one friend lost her baby and another lost his dad.

if there is one thing i know i suck at, it is the way i deal with moments such as these. what do i say? what do i do? how does one deal with it really?

i know no amount of words or cards or flowers or hugs can ease their pain. so what does that leave me? what can a friend do? what can i do?

NOTHING

frustrating isn't it? on the one time you need to do something for someone you care for, you stand/sit still and do nothing because the truth is, there is really nothing one can do.

some say it's enough for you to be there. i say it's not.

my greatest fear in life is not to be unhappy. it's not to be unsuccessful nor poor nor rejected. it is not to be judged nor to be ignored nor to stay single.

my greatest fear in life is death. not my own, but of a loved one.

and everytime someone dear to me loses someone dear to them, my heart breaks into pieces.

not as excited anymore

tomorrow is supposed to be a day free of stress, worries, drama and anything negative.

we've done our shopping, prepared the food, bought new slippers and swimsuit, had the car checked, and every possible preparation there is for a weekend of fun in the beach.

sadly, due to circumstances beyond our control, the excitement over this much awaited weekend was extremely dampened.

but...
we are still going to the beach.
we are still going to chill.
we may still get drunk.

this much i know, it won't be as much fun.

'Nuff with the drama. On with the fun!

the past couple of weeks have been quite stressful.

overtime work up to the wee hours of the morning, not to mention on weekends; bad terrible case of insomnia; add to that the emotional drama in my personal life.

to top it all off, i've been barking like a dog the last couple of days with the added bonus of the extreme heat in the metro!

sheesh! i NEED A BREAK!!!! and KitKat ain't gonna do it for me :)

an out of town trip is in order!!!

so, this weekend, i'm off to the beach with my posses!

gotta soak
    gotta chill
        gotta get drunk

and I can't wait!

Pearl the Landlord

i gotta say, this clip of will farrel with a lil kid posing as the landlord sure made my day!

A Sad Day

one of the most important person in my life failed me.

i'm not mad, i can't get mad. that's how much i love and respect him

what do you do when the one person you've looked up to most of your life disappoints you for the first time?

what do you do when your pillar of strength and truth and everything that is right does something to hurt not just you but the ones dearest to you?

this is all new to me

i'm lost.

and no amount of bling or wine or vodka can make me feel otherwise.

American Idol : 6 - Finally!!!!

Sanjaya's stint ended today! And i couldn't be any happier!

I know a lot of the so-called Fanjayas in the world are sad but i'm sure they weren't surprised. It's been long overdue. The hair and the antics just weren't enough this week.

However, that being said, i'm still not wowed by this year's batch. It's just not the same. While it's true that there is more variety in this year's competition, past idol contestants were better than most of the finalists today.

I still have high hopes for Jordin and Blake though.
As for Melinda, i was grinning from ear to ear when Simon made that comment about her acting surprised each time a complement is given. Sheesh! I mean, how many praises does she need to actually believe that yes, she can sing and she sings well?!

Yes, I'm weak!

Diamonds are forever,
Sparkling round my little finger.
Unlike men, the diamonds linger;
Men are mere mortals who
Are not worth going to your grave for

So, my jeweler came in today. Despite my desperate cry, she opened her bag of goodies! Lo and behold, my eyes twinkled at the site of her new collection.

Before i knew it, she was taking them out of her lil box and slowly putting them on my ears! With a mirror in one hand, she told me how beautiful they looked on me. Heck! They did look good on me! And the matching ring was to die for!

What can i do? I'm a girl! I'm weak!

And i have a new set of diamonds!

Woohoo!!

Diamonds are forever, forever, forever.
Forever and ever

_____________________________________
Lyrics taken from Shirley Bassey's Diamonds are Forever

The Greatest Victory of All

When you hate someone, you give them power over you.

Life is too short to spend it hating somebody. Plot your revenge then put it in the back burner until an opportunity presents itself to annihilate the enemy.

Then enjoy your life on your own terms.

By the time your paths cross again, the people you hate will realize how pathetic their lives are compared to your magnificent one.

And all you'll feel is pity. And compassion.
They'll hate you for it and this gives you power over them.

The wheel turns.

But you no longer need that power. For you will be your own woman. On your own terms.

This is the greatest victory of all.

How can I

...forgive when there is no remorse?

...keep the ghost of my sordid past from the constant torture and taunting?

...end a chapter in my life without the proper closure?

...forget the hurt?

...trust and believe again when all my paradigms have shifted from what used to be true?

...start anew when the past is still holding me back?

i have tried. most days i succeed.
some days, i fail.

and even if the failures are so few, how come i feel they count more?

Green With Envy

I know! i know! it's never a sign of good character to be envious of anything or anyone! But what can i do???

For lack of anything to do, i figured since i got time in my hands, (what with the 5-day vacation) i'd go check on what's been happening to my peers. So there, I went online and checked on my friendster account. With the schedule i have, it's difficult to keep updated with the latest on my friends and the next best thing is to browse on their pages to touchbase with them.

Click. Click. Click.

Some had new babies, the others got married, travelled the world, moved to a different country, has come out of the closet, broken up, got back together, etc.

Click. Click. Click.

Then came the page of an old old friend. We haven't really talked in a long while and haven't seen each other in ages. Last year, she told me she was getting married. I wished her well. I saw the pictures and a short video. It was beautiful.

They got married at Waling-Waling Beach in Boracay. It was simple and intimate. Pictures/videos do speak a thousand words and my, they said a lot.

Normally, i don't get all weepy and emotional on weddings but something about the way they looked got to me. They were happy and the people around them felt the same. I never got to meet her husband but i knew their story.

More than the gown, the ring, the venue, i got envious of how in love they were. And that my childhood bestfriend has finally found her prince. A long way from pony tails and teen magazines, she has grown and lived what most girls only dream about.

I am happy for her. Envious, yes, as i have yet to find what she has found.

I know my time will come.

me, pau and bottomless margaritas

i've always been close to my sister but we had a falling out a couple of years back. she got crazily hooked on her new bike (yes, my sister is a biker chick! with biker friends to boot!) and i got involved in other things that we ended up spending more time with our own circle of friends rather than have our usual weekly rendezvous. and, while we didn't entirely drift apart, i have to admit (as i wrote in a previous entry), that i have missed my lil sister.

being able to touchbase with her is on top of my to-do list for 2007.
a long overdue margarita night to start off our weekly ritual is imperative.

and last night, we did.

in between margaritas, we talked for hours.
our plans. our mishaps in the past. the men in our lives, both present and past. our parents. the house that we bought. the car we're gonna buy this summer. the standing pact of taking care of each other as we grow old, not wanting to be like one of those who end up fighting over money and other trivialities that siblings tend to have.

i spent last night not with my sister, but with a friend and i'm glad we're back.

after the rain

the rain has stopped
the birds are out
a rainbow beams from a distance

and, though the ground is still wet,
i'm ready to go out and play again

Lesson Learned #2

Anything that is too much is not good and OVERthinking is NOT an exception.
For those who know me, i'm sure it's common knowledge that i tend to think too much. I've always lived by the rule of being not just 1 but 2 steps forward all the time. Firmly believing that no matter how careful one can be, there is always that probability that something bad will come out eventually.
In all my previous relationships, i have been guilty of this. I THINK TOO MUCH! And, while it has saved me a lot of tears and mishaps, there have been some instances where it backfired. Opportunities were lost and the list of my what if's and could've beens started to pile up.
Last night, i did it again! I've been talking to an old friend the past couple of days now and while i'm happy with the fact that after three years, we have once again reconnected, a part of me is a bit wary of seeing him. Being the way i am, i've created a whole bunch of nuisances to think about. Instead of lookin forward to it, I started to stress over stuff like, what if we feel the same way/what if we don't? or what if i feel the same and he doesn't and vice versa? Bottomline, i dreaded seeing him again!
And then I realized, what the hell am i doing pre-empting things and losing sleep over something that may or may not happen? I will have to do things differently this time. We lost each other before because we both thought too much when in fact it was so simple.
So now, imma take my sweet time and see where this goes. Nuff with the drama! I'm goin out with him this weekend and let's see what happens. Be it friendship or beyond, who knows? Either way, i'm just as glad to have him back.
Besides, as Jack Burton aptly put it, "You were not put upon this earth to get it!"

Capricciosa Ristorante @ Greenbelt 2

Capricciosa Ristorante, one of the latest addition at Greenbelt 3's wide array of restos proved to be a really nice place for people dining in groups.

The food:
They had the usual antipasti (appetizer), zuppe (soup), insalata (salad), pizze (pizza), spaghetti and gelato. For cheese lovers like me, a must try is their Quattro Formaggio pizza. The combination of 4 cheeses using blue cheese as the base was a very good complement to the soft and semi sweet pizza dough.

The pasta servings were huge but taste was not sacrificed. Nothing fancy with their version of Pesto but their Mushroom Spaghetti was to die for! Noodles were cooked to perfection and the tomato based sauce was infused with a generous portion of cheese. YUMMY!!!!!

The staff/service
We were waited on by Joker and Glyna and they were so nice. Yes, it took a while for our food to arrive but they were nice enough to check on us a few times until orders were served.

The price
It's not as expensive as other Italian restos as the servings were good for 3 or 4 people. However, you have to ask them if you're ordering too much or too little since you may not leave any room left for dessert.

The verdict
Capricciosa is a relatively new place which definitely left room for improvement. My expections were met as far as the quality of food they serve. However, since it is a new place, not a lot of people are familiar with their menu. It would've helped a lot if their menu had more illustrations. Eating is a feast for all senses and then next best thing to actually tasting it is seeing how it's gonna come out.

I'm a sucker for Italian food so I will definitely go back. I have yet to taste their wine so i'm lookin forward to that.

Because I Said So

In a desperate attempt te ensure that her youngest daughter doesn't end up like her, Daphne Wilder (Diane Keaton) decided to search for the perfect man for her.

But when Milly (Mandy Moore) found out that the Jason (Tom Everett Scott) and Johnny (Gabriel Macht) both came out of the personal ad that her mom made, she finally had to say something.

Because I Said So is a story of a mother's love that tries to answer questions like "Where does it begin and where does it end?". It is a film both the young and the old can appreciate. A mix of comedy and romance plus a heavy dose of reality sure make this film worth watching.

And yes, it may help one to understand why moms are the way they are sometimes.

Lesson Learned #1

"If you love someone, you say it right then, out loud. Otherwise, the moment just passes you by. "

- My Bestfriend's Wedding

I made the same mistake a couple of years back when i failed to acknowledge what i felt for this guy. His name is Gen - smart, funny and everything else i wanted for in a man. We had that kind of a connection which can never be replaced. One that happens only once in a person's life.

The catch, he had a gf. I waited for him to choose me over her but the time never came so i decided to let him go.

Last week, he called and for the first time, we got to talk about what really happened. What we both discovered came as a surprise, a big one. Turns out, while i was waiting for him to choose me over her, he was waiting for me to make him choose as he was ready to be with me. He thought I didn't feel the same so he kept quiet for fear of losing what we had. When i finally called it quits, all his fears were validated. That to me, it meant nothing. And so, he quietly bowed down.

If only someone said something.

He's back in my life now. For what reason, i have yet to discover

I did miss him. More than anything, i miss the friendship.

"It's time to make new memories," he said. But he still has a gf and the lessons in the past may come in handy this time around. For now, just knowing he's back will suffice.

It's never good to assume so now i'll be taking everything with a grain of salt.

I'm older.
I'm smarter.
I know what i deserve.